Book Review: Around the World in 80 Dates

So I just finished a book called Around the World in 80 Dates by Jennifer Cox. This book was witty, romantic, a tad bit crazy, but mostly, really enjoyable. It also allowed me to get a lot of insight into the world of dating and the search for one's 'soul mate.' The book is based on the actual journey that Jen took to find her own 'soul mate.' This Londoner was in her mid thirties and fresh out of an unsuccessful 5 year relationship. She was then forced to reevaluate love and life. An avid traveler, Jennifer came up with the idea to be set up with 80 different dates around the world in hopes that one of them would turn out to be her one true love. Whether this was an act of desperation or inspiration, the trip proved successful and Jennifer not only fell in love, but found a new part of herself.

Next I want to highlight a few key things I learned from this book.

1. While soul mates do exist, you may not only have one.
Jennifer said that she believed in soul mates, but also believed that it was possible to have more than one in the different phases of you life. This seems true, as many people fall in love young, then find the person they actually marry and spend the rest of their life with later in life.

2. Evaluate past relationships to make positive changes in the future.
Looking at who we dated in the past gives us a sense of what worked and what didn't, and what traits we will look for and should try to avoid in the future.

3. Making a list of what you're looking for in a partner isn't necessarily a bad thing.
While most people believe that making a list of expectations sets us up for failure, in actuality, making a list actually helps us determine what we really want and value. Now while a list is a good thing, when they are more materialistic, unrealistic, or excessive is when problems arise. But by making a short list, such as tall, caring, and an interest in travel is not too much to ask for at all, than one should try to settle for nothing less than what they deserve.

4. Opposites may not attract in relationships.
In the book, Jennifer meets a man who studies the concept of love. He tells her that people fall in love with and are more compatible with people who are similar to them or reflect them, as if you love yourself, you would just as well love someone just like you. While it may be exciting to date someone completely different than you, in the long run, you want someone who is like you to settle down with.

And lastly
5. Don't give up a good thing when you find it.
After meeting her soul mate, Jennifer knew he was the one, but still went on other dates just to make sure. In the end, she cut her trip short to be with him, as she realized that she had felt a deep connection that, although she may be able to replicate with someone else, the timing was now to be with him.

This book made me laugh and reevaluate my own tactics on finding love. While her plan is something I might decide to do someday, right now I'm just too young and in a good place. While I may not be in love of have a significant other, I'm going to wait a little while longer before I trek around the world in search of something that, for all I know, could already be right in front of me. But if I become a single 40 something and still have yet to find love, then, just maybe, I'll hop on a plane, and look for love.